Well that sucks

I've found out recently that I can't sing. I was always under the impression that I could, heck even sang some duets at church and weddings here and there. People always complemented my voice, so I thought I couldn't be too bad.

Well, apparently I'm not any better than those rejects at American Idol who go before S,P&R swearing up and down how good they are then can't hold a note if their life depended on it. Supposedly I can hit lower notes but when I try to sing high notes (and have to do falsetto in order to accomplish this) I can't keep my pitch. It's so weird. I hear myself and I hear the song and I swear I am singing in tune! I always thought it was a confidence thing for me and high notes because I get nervous and I don't sing them that strong (thankfully I suppose). This is when I'm playing the piano or singing alone. I sing with more confidence when I'm with other people or singing along with an artist that I like. I decided to drag my friend into doing an experiment with me and have her record me singing (with me listening to a song through headphones) so I could hear what I sound like singing with more confidence.

I think you can figure out how that went. Granted I can barely tolerate listening to myself as I'm too embarassed but I had to know how I am. I kinda wish I never did it now because it has made me quite sad since then. Especially since my husband agreed that I can't sing high notes and apparently have never been able to (although he never complained..??). I wish he would have told me this a little sooner! He agreed that I can sing lower notes really well but as soon as I start to sing out of my range, I go off-key. Unfortunately there are not too many songs out there with an 8-9 note range...

Music has always been a big part of my life as I've played the piano since I was 7 and was in chorus in school plus church. Everyone that knows me knows that I sing non-stop (could never do Big Brother, I would drive the internet watchers crazy from causing the feeds to get cut all the time). Needless to say I've barely sung a word since then. I just can't bring myself to do it. I know that a lot of people that can't sing still do it but I dunno, the fun has been taken out of it for me or something. I start to sing out of habit, then remember and stop. Hubby tries his best to encourage me and says that I can do it, I just need to work on my control and diaphragm, etc., but I'm not that certain. Don't get me wrong, if I'm playing the piano and singing alone, I can tell if I didn't quite hit a higher note here and there. But singing along with other people....I thought I was always on target with that. That's what really kills me because I'm sitting there listening to the music, hearing my voice in my head and thinking I'm matching the tune but in reality I'm not.

Hubby still swears I can work on it but I'm not too sure...

If I don't sound out of tune to me now, how am I going to tell when I am singing it right?